I've been spending more time meditating, seems appropriate given the current political climate with opposing sides clashing every which way. Given certain calms and imaginings that spring from within, it's like an exercise where I'm trying to strengthen my ability to be aware of intangible realms, and request some form of healing. I've recently had an interesting meet and greet with Chinnamasta that I had hoped to strengthen through continuous use of her mantra. However, as I proceeded to invoke her imaginings last night, in the middle of moving through my japa beads, my mind made the gradual shift to another Mahavidya in which I remember in very little detail. Ma Dhumavati's mantra is very simple and mainly consists of her name. Hence, if you can remember her name, you'll most likely remember her mantra after seeing it once.
Slightly over a month ago, I took a short trip to the legendary Mt. Shasta, which had all sorts of obvious oddities occur unlike my prior trips. On the second night, before getting some shut-eye, I had taken out my copper yantra dedicated to the 10 Mahavidyas and lit a candle to watch over me as I slept. Given that our rental was very close to a late 1800's cemetery, the fear of beings messing with my slumber arose, where the copper yantra was enough to subdue such worries. While still adjusting myself to call it a night, I had the image of a decrepit elderly white woman with frizzy white hair pop into my mind, almost like a character from a zombie flick, but not as macabre. At first I brushed the image away as my imagination, but the image arose immediately afterwards, which engaged my analytical mind. Was this someone that I had seen earlier or maybe this is a lost soul from the cemetery requesting my assistance? My mind quickly went through numerous ideas no matter how absurd, but I just as quickly brushed it off to rest for the night. In waking, I lingered in the comfort of my rest with my back towards the Mahavidya copper yantra that I had propped up. As my mind quickly adjusted itself to my surroundings, I felt as if someone was standing behind me. That "presence" then rushed itself closer to me to the point where I felt like it plugged itself into me from behind me. Immediately, my sympathetic nervous system chose to mentally fight. I cursed this thing, this sensation moving inside me to damnation reminiscent of my Christian education upbringing. In my short battle, I heard numerous masculine and feminine voices speaking in strange tongues, and felt light glowing at my crown as I was lulled into my old enemy, sleep paralysis. I've experienced sleep paralysis quite a bit in my life, particularly in my pre-adult years. There is one I remember in particular around my high school years. After a nap, my eyes and consciousness were awake to my room, but I couldn't twitch a muscle. Realizing that I was under paralysis, you basically tell yourself to wake up and move until you are able. In that process, I immediately felt a breathe on my neck with a subtle growl that grew louder as I focused my awareness on it. Again, fight or flight, where you fight for the ability to move and wake up out of the paralysis. At this time, I developed the opinion that sleep paralysis was simply the in-between state of the astral plane and physical reality. Hence, I was still dreaming and dreams were just dreams for me then. After my recent Mt. Shasta incident, I kept that experience in mind and related that experience to my high school sleep-paralysis experience relayed above. As odd as this experience was, it was not the most odd event to occur on this trip, but that maybe another story. In understanding sleep paralysis, I remember a course called "Visions of the Sacred" in my early college years, where certain traditions associate sleep paralysis with an "old hag" that would paralyze a sleeping individual by sitting on his/her chest. This "old hag" carried vampiric succubus qualities that would feast on the victims energy. The correlation between the "old hag" and my "decrepit elderly white woman" image was too outstanding. For all my reasoning, I could not portray this "old hag" visit as negative, though it was a frightening experience. My logic took me through an analysis: first showing me that the Mahavidyas were watching over me as the copper yantra was nearby; second, that given my association with Ma Kali I'm assuming that lower entities would not mess with me; and third, I also would not expect harmful entities to approach me when I had a few high vibrational gemstones around me. But still couldn't conjure an answer. Could this be something trying to reach out to me for assistance? Or, could this be a teacher given that the internal experience after plugging inside me was surreal? This bout of sleep paralysis wasn't even my most recent, where I similarly had an experience last week. While coming out of sleep and jumping into paralysis, I felt as though something was trying to grab me and pick me up. I shook myself to the fully awakened state, and simply grunted, "fuck, again!". Though no visuals, there was still something about this "old hag" that just stuck with me believing it to have returned, but I couldn't settle on a reason. I had asked myself if she was a Mahavidya, but when I looked through my books, there were no images of an elderly frail woman. I know I have seen a form of the Indian Devi as a fierce elderly figure, but brushed it off as either a village Goddess, or a destructive Matrika (Mother) entity. Going back to my meditation, as I honed in on the reverberations of Dhumavati's mantra, I immediately noticed the difference between Chinnamasta and Dhumavati. Chinnamasta was solid though decapitated, where you feel grounded in your body with the ability to be aware outside of your body. Dhumavati was more tied to the soul realm, where I was awareness not attached to a body. In fact, I appeared to be above the physical realm in this gloomy area looking down into the physical realm. In order not to confuse with the Atman/Spirit, this felt more like ghosts, or what we call fucking Bhoot. As a child, I was really frightened of the dark, because I always felt there was something lurking and watching. Despite my utter fascination with the paranormal, these fears were hard to conquer, which I am confident to admit knowing that many share the same phobia. However, such fears have been drastically minimized due to my practice and acquaintance with Ma Kali. Seeing the "old hag" in Mt. Shasta, even just in my head, was unsettling. However, I was equipped with the ability to not let my fears pull me down. In my meditation, I felt the rush of fear as if knowing something frightening was about to be revealed, but I wasn't about to turn back. There she was, an old decrepit fierce woman, where in forgetting the mantra my mouth was uttering, I calmly paid attention to my fear. It was like the sensation of "oh, shit!", as I thought to myself, am I going to finally face one of my greatest childhood fears. Fear is always the opposite end of the spectrum where one should linger. It is the real root of all evil. And here I was. In facing this "old hag", luckily the mantra to Ma Dhumavati was still being uttered, as I quickly remembered who I was attempting to contact. As a Mahavidya, I simply looked at her and realized she was just another form of my beloved Ma Kali. With the sensation of a child realizing that it is his mother behind a Halloween mask, I ran up to her and said "I know you are Ma, you can't scare me". I looked at her with the love as in the way a child looks at his/her mother with my arms thrown in the air expecting her to pick me up. I was held in her arms, fully protected from everything she was to show me. She showed me outside of myself, outside of the colorful existence that we call reality, to a gloomy realm a few notches above the physical reality where ghosts seemed to have their play. Though I wasn't much interested in the ghosts, I focused on the numerous layered realms that were above the visual Ma Dhumavati was showing me. It was expansive to see that there are other layers to what we perceive and to look down from this gloomy realm into the colorful physical reality. As it was most likely to release some fears, I was only able to quickly grasp a few moments before the imaginings quickly dissolved. After meditation, I returned to my books and online images to re-discover Ma Dhumavati. Though I was more familiar with the "smoky image" shown above, Ma Dhumavati is associated with the elderly form of Kali, the "old hag". No doubt from my expression above, I felt her as Ma Kali more so than Tara and Chinnamasta. Dr. David Frawley defines her as the "Grandmother Spirit", or the ancestral guide to the Goddesses in his Tantric Yoga and the Wisdom Goddesses. He further describes her as the "smoky one" where she obscures one thing to reveal another, like how she obscured physical reality for me to reveal something on the other side. She is the primordial energy before creation, Shakti before Shiva, where she exists as pure potential. Hence, she is considered to be the void. She is not revealed in the ordinary world, but exists in the background like a smoke screen.
With Ma Dhumavati, I feel blessed for the opportunity to be given a glimpse of what is behind the smoke screen. Moreover, I'm really realizing that there is more truth hidden within us, for those daring enough to seek for it.
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Chinnamasta on the other hand, because I'm fairly new to her essence, I didn't know what to expect or how I would be internally triggered. Allowing her mantra to reverberate throughout my 12 chakra system, beginning from bottom upwards, I dissolved into her being one fateful night. Not knowing what was to come, along with the inability to actually imagine her as a real being given that she is decapitated, I thought I wasn't going to be able to experience her. She seemed unreal, like who goes around walking without a head. Hell, if it wasn't for Ma Kali, I'm not sure I would even invoke such a being out of fear. Not sure if it was due to my work with Ma Kali, but unlike Ma Kali and Ma Tara, Chinnamasta did not hold that terrifyingly terrific passionate flare. Actually, she may have, I could be just simply accustomed to it and look forward to the fiery spinal thrusts of dissolving my atomic structure. Going up my chakras and allowing the seeds of mantra to expand my inner feeling, I wasn't expecting to see much but rather just linger in the intensity. However, once at the throat chakra, where judgment resides in search for the truth, I noticed that my head wasn't quite attached. In fact, my head was resting tilted upwards on my hands with my outstretched arm as if decapitated, with my mouth gaping wide open filling with Sushumna nectar. Moreover, I didn't just have one head, I had three, with my two other heads similarly placed in what I assumed to be my many arms. Similarly, the two heads drank of the Ida and Pingala Nadi's, the feminine and masculine psyche. At this point, I'm focusing on my head, which is quite not attached to my body, where I'm aware of the Kundalini flows into my three mouths. Not wanting my body to be left behind with the spiritual experience, I noticed that I held the ability to reverse the flow, where the channels would flow out of my mouth with a rush downwards into my body. Moving into my crown, and into what could be higher with four remaining chakras above, I allowed my body to internally adjust itself, particularly in the cranial cavity where the right hemisphere (left side of the body) needed to relax and match the right hemisphere (left side of the body). Once balanced, I felt whole and complete within myself. No where left to run to with all my spiritual practices, no more mantras or other permission slips, just fully relaxed in either the sensation of holding infinity or within my own ego-self, it didn't matter what I chose as it was all perfect. It was my self-sacrifice that allowed my ego-self to surrender, but it was a surrender filled with the sensation of strength. Further, by seeing myself from the decapitated heads peering at my animal body, such only added credence to the idea that consciousness is not tied to the body, that what we deem to be our spirit is only awareness. Again, I knew not what to expect and sure wasn't thinking I'd morph into this sensational experience. I guess I assumed there would be messages, but then what would a decapitated Goddess say? That won't stop me from trying, but at least I now feel she's willing to assist me. I may be pursuing her out of sheer curiosity, feeling safe guarded with Ma Kali's blessings. But I can't quite feel the emotional heart chakra expansion with her in comparison with Ma Kali. However, I can't feel that love with Ma Tara yet either. Nonetheless, I'll accept her wonderful blessing of a balanced healing knowing that it's all leading towards a bigger picture, one that I cannot currently fathom.
On this blessed 11:11, I sat meditating on my balcony soaking the warmth of the radiant sun. For me, when I'm able to relax into the intensity of the heat, I feel like I'm being slowly warmed into relaxation. It's an excellent feel to get in deeper, get the thoughts to quiet especially after the wonderful catalyst of an election where a loud mouth neanderthal (fear no logic) outwit the most dangerous gang on the planet (fear with logic), I was subdued into recognizing how far it is that I have come internally. From my personal catalysts triggering in early 2014, I was led down a road around heavily seeking the real power we hold within, the good esoteric stuff filled with tantric fokelore. I had time on my hands, and I really wanted to shift my life in a different direction. I didn't conceive then what that might entail, the psychological dissection moving me in every which bi-polar way, into what seems to never-ending bursts of bliss to spiraling fathoms of doubt. Strapped with a few gemstones, tantric mantras (Matra/Padmasambhava), a wealth of knowledge from years of intense reading birthing from childhood, and the use of taoist breathing techniques, I purged and damn did I purge! While on my balcony, I recognized where I was then, to where I am now with the ability to tap into mindful and no-mind bliss. To be in this state, is really to have released enough attachments to recognize the still of the mind. These attachments are a constant adornment from what we perceive with our senses, to what we use to dull our senses, where many just never think to quietly subdue our senses. Anything triggered is really something up to be purged, which I now leave to drift into an imaginative flower to be removed from my personal space, psychic ninja style. Given that I have been doing this long enough, I am not so much triggered by the occurrences of the physical world. Being an empath, empathy still illogically rules me even when I have no comprehension why, I can at least stay quiet now, present to the blissful vibrantly colorful moment. Moreover, much of what use to trigger me, is now blissfully quiet. My waters prefer stillness. This past few days have been another story. Post the apocalyptic election, I have been triggered, not by the election result which actually worked out in my favor in preferring the quickest catalyst, but by the turmoil resulting where the masses have been instantly affected by something solely perceived through media sources. Many of us will not see these politicians in the flesh, but the reality show of advanced politics caused a raucous showing how easy it is for the elite to affect our vibration, feeling, beliefs, actions. Hence, the reason why of the possibility of the Caucasian George Soros funding the Black Lives Matter movement. It's just advanced politics, how easy it is for the elite to move the pawn pieces. It's all in the media, filling up the masses field of awareness, there is no other way to think for those drunk on this illusory heroine. I was triggered by the fact that my people, my loved ones, simply fell for it! They lowered their vibration in this pivotal time of expansion. In them being triggered, I was also triggered, and realized, still more purging. The sun is penetrating it's heat by now, I'm snapping in and out of thoughts in my attempt to clear them, I realized that my mouth was verbalizing a mantra to Cinnamasta seeking for wholeness, where Kali's presence was felt behind me. Here, I realized that the Feminine Divine that I have sought out had walked me through my path at each and every step, including the darkest of times. Having verbalized her mantric seeds, as I faced my shadows, fears, weaknesses, self-victimization to the point of blacking out being the only option, in her terrible form frightening away the greatest of tragedies, she let me know that she had my back more than I could imagine. Knowing her to be nothing less than the Queen of Wisdom, the sensation of confidence rushed me with an immediate kick of upliftment. It's not that I have to face my fears or go through trials and tribulations. Really, each moment is created for our best outcome. Each moment is created by our Higher Self, our own self, for the purpose of the wisdom that we seek within ourselves. In my 31 years, I discovered a feeling vibrating from the Feminine Divine's words, an emotion of something I had been told about all my life from Hindus and Christians. A concept that has always alluded me in my seeking leaving me hypercritical of those who portrayed having it. It was simply faith. I discovered Faith as not something to believe in, but a wellspring that needs to sprout from within using experience. It seems faith is not up for logical dissection, but an intuitive harmony lighting the path. Because of this feeling of faith, the triggers that arose in wishing to release the fears and anguish of humanity, especially of my loved ones, was released. I suddenly remembered that every one is connected with Higher Self with their lives also designed and crafted with such blessings regardless of holding faith. Everyone is on their own journey, and many need to traverse such triggers to be the Heroes of their stories. I needed to remember and have faith that all is crafted for the divine's delight, our divine comedy. I continued to release the triggers to bask in the holy light of my conscious awareness, feeling the macrocosmic pull within the microcosmic design. If I can't have faith in myself yet still under the guise of duality believing the divine to be separate from me, then faith in an external divine is sufficient until source is completely driven from within. This 11:11 moment of manifestation, looking through my third-eye periscope beyond our advanced lesson in civil karma, I feel pretty damn good for what's about to come.
Diwali night, October, 30, 2016, I left my night time meditation to sleep telling myself, "holy shit, you've just got a massive upgrade". I was left in awe and the knowing that nothing will be the same. I know my meditation has been more expansive, but to bridge the two worlds, of the seen with the unseen, it appears to be a pioneering experience for me. It's Diwali, we have the abundant materialist Lakshmi who is honored and praised in this tradition, to attract the fortunes available in the new year. As a devotee of Kali, I would like to transcend such attachments, but realizing her manifestations as Sodashi, or Kamala, the wisdom of the universe is beautifully abundantly there for our enjoyment. Nonetheless, after leaving the parental households of numerous relatives all paying homage to Lakshmi, I returned home to meditate holding a copper blessed yantra dedicated to the Mahavidyas, including the Lakshmi twin Kamala. Immediately drawn within with the help of my guides, my channels are flowing, and my mind is tied to the mantra vibrating from my third-eye as the vibrations echo through my body. As I pause to move into a state of being of no-thought to feel the connection between my crown and to a place beyond creation, I'm immediately slammed into a wave that forces my body to convulse. Lingering here, I'm immediately noticing the subtle sounds of my surroundings with no mental interpretations. My inner body is clear which can only be described as oxygen entering into new areas of my body, from my lower pubic area to my forehead. My skull is struggling to hold the energy within my head, as my body is stretching, spine cracking, muscles releasing, the only thing I can do is to relax into myself. As anxiety and stress is flushed down my grounding cord from my root chakra to the center of the Earth, I finally feel like myself, unbound by the external worlds wants and demands.
In my own psyche, I needed to forgive the worst of the worst, but first I needed to realize who that may be for myself. If Showtimes "Dexter" taught me anything, it was to enter the mind of a feeling-less sociopath and see life through a serial killer's perspective. "Dexter" is a show that leaves you supporting the serial killer, who becomes somewhat relate-able as a good-guy character as he targets hard-criminals as a way to manage his "dark passenger". So typical murders may not be so bad for me, I wanted to realize who really I think is unforgivable. I realized, that it would be anyone who does something to criminally harm children. In embodying the Christ energy, I needed to ask myself the more difficult question, "what if I did something this heinous in a past life?". As the panic attack developed at this sheer idea, I realized I needed to heal those aspects of me. In remembering the love of Christ, I felt his pain and humiliation on the Cross as I looked out at the shouting audience wishing his ultimate demise. As a God, I assumed Jesus could easily detach from his pain, the way yogis and taoists detach from their senses. Jesus could have been completely detached, the way we go into no-mind under meditation or hypnosis, but he remained present to experience the pain for the benefit of his accusatory viewers. I asked myself, how would Christ's suffering benefit his viewers? Immediately I was in the position of shouting profanities and the worst hells upon a fragile tearful figure spread out on the Cross. In that fury, I heard the Christ mumble, "Father forgive them". In that glow, I realized despite what I did to what appeared to me to be another flawed human being, that figure still loved me enough to have asked to have me forgiven. All the while moving through this, the mantra to Goddess Kali was being vibrated and echoed through my inner caverns. The worst of the worst all have one thing in common, fear. They work from a place of fear, instill fear, and find power through fear. The Goddess Kali has always been portrayed in a very fearful aspect, one that is suited to Halloween, which was the following day of October 31, 2016. In attempting to unite with Her, in her fearful form, I realized my own fears in doing so. In other words, She was my Goddess of Fear. In helping me with my fears and bridging love into parts of me I deem unforgivable, I needed to fall in love with the Goddess of Fear. The one thing more fearful than being a victim of heinous criminal acts would be to commit the heinous criminal act. But we need to recognize the wisdom of those circumstances, such as the wisdom gained from the act of the Christ Crucifixion, which is to completely love and forgive others and our own selves. Thereafter, the meditation concluded by seeing myself seated in lotus position in the center of an ancient court surrounded by the 10 Mahavidyas, all showering their blessings on me. However, it's not that we were separate, but we were all one. I could feel them outside me as I get to admire them, but I also felt them inside me, as me. As Tara I would feel fierce, as Sodashi I would be a teenage girl ready to rebel and forge my way into adulthood, as Chinnamasta I would feel balanced within, and so forth.
In many of our ancient traditions, from Hinduism to Native Indigenous, the Goddess is praised as the weaver of our existence. In particular Hindu sects, the Goddess as Shakti, or in her Adi-Shakti form as Kali, is known as the MahaMaya, the Great Illusion. While Shiva represents the ability to be aware, as he is prakasa, the light of consciousness, Shakti gives us something to be aware of. Hence, it's through the illusory qualities that we're provided with the space-time fabric that consists of the Universe. Therefore, what many religions fail to realize, those that are of the anti-matrix breed, is that their deities or figures of worship would not exist but for the matrix. If you believe heaven to be a tangible existence, or something of the like in spiritual form, well, that would not exist but for the matrix. With the collapse of our Universe into what the Vedics teach as Brahaman, so would collapse every form, including every figment of worship that we have sought on this planet. The illusion we find ourselves in is crafted for the delight of Shiva and Shakti, the attractive positive and negative energy, which creates the ability for each of us to carry out our story, where we traverse our Hero's Journey. Hence, the illusion provides us with our existence, our forms of traditions, our forms of worship, basically our existence. In Native American traditions, the Grandmother Spider, like the Greek Ariadne, weaves humanity's story and existence. Munya Andrews, The Seven Sisters of the Pleiades. Within that story, there is often a balance required, a type of path where judgment is used to keep matters progressing, or insists on an orderliness. Such is often the work of our judgment deities, mostly influenced by the Egyptian Ma'at (maatrix) where we have obtained our balancing scales. Id. Even the Catholics have the divine mother as expressed as Mother Mary, a figure not praised in later protestant traditions who sought to purge the pagan elements of Catholicism. Just as Siddhartha who became Buddha Shakyamuni was born of his mother Maya, so was Jesus who became the Christ figure was born of his mother Mar-y, where Mar implies the ocean of creation. Bringing this back to Kali, the mother of the cosmos is often defined by two terms, MahaMaya as the Great Illusion as expressed earlier, and MahaVidya as the Great Wisdom Goddess. Hence, the divine mother provides you what you desire, be it delusion on one end, or wisdom on the other. Therefore, the matrix can be seen as a computer program of existence. However, those that seek to attack the program are simply pointing the finger at the programmer as opposed to their own selves who have sought delusion over wisdom. Not to play-down any Archontic forces that may place a virus in the programming, but to ultimately conclude that we still have free-choice despite such influences, where substantial wisdom is to be gained from obstacles. Essentially, I'm exhausted from hearing "maya" is bad, etc., where our power has always lied within us, including the ability to give our power away and delude ourselves into thinking we're powerless. We really have no one else to blame but ourselves when we fall into our delusions, not satan, not demons, when we realize the power the matrix has placed within us to seek the truth and wisdom of each matter. As the great Mother of creation, she's given us the opportunity to get completely lost within our own delusions, or liberate ourselves and seek wisdom. In other words, we can't point the finger elsewhere, but at our own selves.
Law of Attraction: Law of Attraction teachings disclose that in order to attract an object or circumstance into one's life, one has to match that frequency. That frequency is found through our own vibrations indicated by our emotional body. In other words, FEEL like you have already accomplished obtaining the object or circumstances, and FEEL into as much as possible. In other words, imagine the life you desire, and FEEL into it to trigger your emotional body. Emotions tends to follow thought patterns, where if one feels angry, angry thoughts will follow, if feeling happy, happy thoughts will follow. Hence, when you FEEL into what you are trying to attract, your emotional body will also trigger your Psyche, including any blockages that inhibit manifestation. Mantra: Shivoham is also a mantra, where mantra is derived from the word manas or mind. Hence, the use of mantras triggers a re-calibration of thoughts, and directs focus. To place the Law of Attraction technique above with the chosen mantra is a powerful tool to becoming closer to Shivoham, or another deity of choice. To vibrationally match the deity of choice by understanding and embodying His/Her mythology and maintaining focus through the use of mantra, well, you're bound to at least feel something shifting. Blockages: To embody a deity through the use of imagination can raise all sorts of blockages. One such blockage as found throughout our societies is a manipulative and domineering understanding of humility. Raised in a Hindu household, we've bowed to everything, honored numerous external things as sacred, and certain things can create offense such as trimming a tulsi (holy basil) plant to some. Raised in Christian education, we were constantly told to repent because we are sinners, told that we're unworthy, etc. Under the Law of Attraction, if you're holding a sense of sinful unworthiness or the likes, you may be just further distancing yourself from your divinity, where such ideas and emotions arise when attempting to embody the feeling of the divinity. When such blockages arise, it screws up the meditation where thoughts of unworthiness from a false understanding of humility arise. Meditation: Nonetheless, there are techniques to bypass the blockages. For example, in my meditations to Kali, the divine Mother, I would initially approach her as a child. She's called the Mother for a reason where under this symbol, she's been very easy to approach. It's much easier to imagine oneself as a child then it is to imagine oneself as Shiva. From what I've found, approaching Kali with an ego-identity is the quickest way to trigger her fiercer aspects, though it has its benefits where she assists in clearing. Though to approach her as an equivalent, as Shiva, and vice-versa, to approach Shiva as Kali, well, I'll just say that's a climactic vibration, one that can be felt in the spine. After writing this, I probably should say to approach her as a child, then your ego-self and let her do her work, then Shiva. Hence, in approaching the divine, if it's difficult to place worth on the ego-identity, then choose the divine within, the self-luminous light of consciousness that remains unblemished, to shine forth and match that vibration that you're trying to bridge. Be forewarned, this technique is powerful, so I should provide a warning. To reach for the divine is to unravel the ego-identity, which is everything that you thought you were. iShiva!
The ancient teaching spoke of the unification between the opposites. Not of the good and evil variety, but of positive and negative magnetic forces, of the masculine with the feminine, the yang with yin, the lingam with the yoni, Shiva with Shakti. Within that balance flows harmony, Ananda, the Tao. Within our subtle body lies the ida (feminine) and pingala (masuline) nadi's, energetic channels that separate and combine with each chakra point leading to the third eye. Our third eye is positioned centered between the hemisphere's of our brain, that would be our masculine logical left brain and our feminine creative right brain. Here, we meet the balance of our polar opposites, where we meet ourSelf that feels like a rush flooding downwards through the crown chakra, redoing, remapping, reprogramming everything that we thought ourselves to be. It's where we deconstruct the paradigm instilled within us from being engaged with our senses, and meet something that has been lingering within us beyond our mental facilities. The divine couple is Shiva and Shakti, the magnetic attraction between the positive and negative electrical charge within us that our ego-identity has forgotten and has accidentally attempted to separate. Not only has the divine couple manifested itself externally through magnetic forces, through animalistic attraction, through our ancient stories of divine couples, but also through our own psychology as further articulated in the ancient traditions of Shiva and Shakti. Shiva: Shiva is defined as prakasha, or the light of consciousness. In other words, Shiva is the psychological ability to be "aware". Awareness is mental virginity, or Kumari, the ability to be simply "aware" unstained from any thought-constructs, which include ideas, opinions, beliefs, formulations, etc. Awareness is to be in the complete state of Now, fully present to your experience without clouding it with any ideas and perspectives. To be fully present, is to be able to engage with what you perceive from a completely fresh perspective. To be fully present with everything occurring externally and emotionally internally, we recognize our existence (sat) within the universe. Shiva is our ability to perceive (chit) within the universe. Shakti: Shakti is defined as Mahamaya, or the grand illusion, which is, all that which is perceived. Hence, she is the Mother of our universe. Our universe is created through matrika (term used to identify Sanskrit), or motherly vibrations that creates and destroys universes. Everything is energy, where energy is simply mass multiplied by the speed of light squared (E=m c2) . In other words, that which we perceive, mass, is simple energy divided by the speed of light squared (E/c2 = m). It's because of this energy, this shakti, this prana/chi, the way she moves and vibrates through space-time that we have the Universe and all within it which we perceive. In the Tripura Rahasaya: Secrets of The Supreme Goddess, Shiva is defined as "awareness" and Shakti is defined as "witness". Shiva is our ability to perceive, where Shakti gives us something to perceive, including our faculties of perception. One is the light of consciousness where the other is the vibration of consciousness, for the two are actually one. To worship a divinity is to bring oneself closer to that divinity through what we call love, hence, our concepts of bhakti, devotion, etc. To worship Shiva-Shakti, is to understand and bring oneself closer to understanding our own abilities of being "aware" and "witnessing" the universe, to bring devotion/bhakti/love to that which we perceive as well as our ability to perceive. In worshiping Shiva, embody the Mother of the Universe and attract the attention of Shiva for She is constantly trying to attract our attention with her Illusion. In worshiping Shakti, embody Shiva, the ability to be aware and fall in love with the present moment that the Illusion has provided you. For isn't this what we are, a psychological dance between our mental/sensory faculties and things that we perceive. Isn't that what it means to be the divine couple internally, to fuse the opposite mental faculties within us, and engage our paradigm from a higher perspective, one with cosmic awareness and cosmic creative abilities. Isn't this accomplished through what we call divine love? To unite Shiva with Shakti is part of the tradition that believes in romance of the divine couple. To understand the romance that we ourselves create with that which we perceive. It's the ability to be at an emotionally vibratory state of complete love and completion within. It's the sensation of fulfillment, where nothing more is required. It's to realize that you are the Dance of the Universe occurring within the Universe.
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AuthorOverly educated and continuously exploring and revealing more behind the veil. "It cannot be too highly emphasized that the mystic swims in the same waters in which the psychotic drowns."
-James Wasserman, The Mystery Traditions Archives
August 2019
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