In studying the mystical aspects of numerous exoteric religions, I'm often left wondering why such teachings do not have a wider audience. I was never satisfied with the basic, thou shalt do this, thou shalt not do this, or the whole accept this into your heart and heaven is automatically yours, which seems to plague all major religions and lead us fighting over left-brain doctrine. What's worse is that these concepts are derived more so from blind-faith, not legitimate experience. Those that have experience are often thrown to the wolves, especially if they contradict strict doctrinal understanding.
Hinduism doesn't have as much of a strict notion, but when the threat of conversion arises for the strict Vedic tradition, the Brahamanic tradition has attempted to claim dominance. Though it can be seen as complimentary, the Tantric and Bhakti movements were counter to the Brahamanic caste system, where such teachings permit those on the bottom to achieve spiritual success. Nonetheless, other major religions have either sought to eliminate the mystical and even scientific (physics), reminiscent of the Medieval ages where such understandings could only be expressed in secret societies. Such persecution resulted in limiting the understanding to strict man-made or man-influenced doctrine, which still plays a major role in religions today.
As an example, the Hebrews may interpret their holy books through an oral tradition known as the Qabalah. With such an understanding the literal interpretation of doctrine isn't as important as the psychological development, or in other words, consciousness expansion of an individual. Coming across and meditating on certain ideas, or archetypes, does something to the psyche that quite cannot be elaborated with the symbol of human language. I experienced such in studying the Sephirot of the Tree of Life, particularly the supernal triad, where the creation story of God, Adam, and Eve is pre-school compared to Kether, Chesed, and Binah. Modern day Christianity lacks the Qabalah or other meditative elements, sans the Gnostic, Swedenborg, and others I will not name. Hence, the modern Christian takes a limited logical approach to doctrine, knowing full-well that Jesus was raised listening to Rabbi's. Such was most likely the doing of the Roman empire, which crafted a religion more akin to Mithraic Roman sentiments, though argued to be done in order to convert pagans, but removes much of the mystical Hebrew elements that meditatively allow an individual to perceive deeper into spiritual realms. Two Thousand (2000) years later, you have a religion that praises Jesus' birth on Mithras's birthday, still blames the Jews for Jesus' crucifixion instead of the Roman empire, swears an oath to the Roman creed of Nicea established doctrine inhibiting sovereign thought, and considers the Qabalah/Gnostics to be evil. It's not enough that such groups convert others through the concept of blind-faith, but they have driven those that seek more from their spirituality underground. Hence, the information that was once accessible to the many have become mysteries in the Age of Pisces. Here, one had to become an initiate of the mystery schools, or leave society for solitary experience, in order to pierce beyond the veil.
The creation of the internet ushered in a new age, the age of information. At the palm of our hands, we basically now have access to a limited Akashic record. Information that was once retained in secrecy is now widespread, one that organized religion cannot hide though still manages to fight against. Information regarding once occult knowledge is now easily accessible, though too accessible where now one has to sort through vast amounts of coal to find diamonds. Words and concepts such as yoga, chakras, the third-eye, law of attraction, infinite intelligence (source energy), are much more prevalent as compared to pre-internet. Even pre-internet, those within such traditions would still have limited knowledge where a Guru was required, though a Guru (teacher) probably still should be required to help navigate through information/experiences.
According to the Advaita Vedantic text, the Tripura Rahasaya, it's one's desire that is the driving force behind his/her level of spirituality. From accumulating good merit, one will then be born with the desire to worship God. From worship, one will then be born with the desire to dive deeper into the mysteries, to find a way to unite with God. Hence, it appears that an individuals desire is the level of initiation that they will proceed in life with regards to spirituality, where much of the world may still be solely in the worship and good deeds stage. The worship stage is where the universe appears separate, or dualist (dvaita), where God is worshiped externally through numerous forms. The uniting stage is where the human understands him/herself to be a microcosm of the macrocosm, as the Universe, or nondualist (advaita), where God is simply a level of universal consciousness to be experienced and drawn upon.
Knowing that we are all different and hold different desires, there are those that may solely be interested in accumulating and working on good merit, others may solely want to experience God as separate, and those who want to dive into the rabbit hole of infinity. For those that only desire good merit or to experience God as separate, the rabbit hole may be a dangerous route as it is an unraveling of the ego-identity and a complete change of one's life where they may not desire such. In fact, I would highly recommend the ego-identity building a personal relationship with a Higher Source (duality) before taking the plunge, for it's not fun to walk through the valley of the shadow of ego-death alone. Nonetheless, all paths seem to be molding the ego-identity into something more wholesome, like how a flower goes through numerous phases before blooming.
However, those that have wanted to pierce deeper into realizing the power held within, were required to unravel the ego-identity for which many simply do not desire. Many are happy with their lives and would rather engage in typical material pursuits and leave spirituality for the mandatory religious gatherings. Many are also happy in bringing in religion more and more into their life, with daily prayer. And of course, there are those who seek material, and possibly spiritual aspects for self-interest. But for those willing to empty the ego-identity to serve on a larger basis, and challenge societal/religious norms and deeply held beliefs, in order to expand and connect one's consciousness with a higher version of Self, those are the one's ready for initiation into the greater mysteries. Like success in any pursuit, it's the degree of your desire.
One question that I often hear by those with a spiritual leaning is discovering one's purpose. It seems proper for those seeking something spiritual to seek more out of life, so purpose seems to fall into play. Even those that are into self-help material or some sort of entrepreneurship seem to fall into this category, as opposed to those who attain a certificate and move through life with a typical 9am-5pm. It's, what can we do that will provide the most out of our life experience. It's asking, what is the purpose for our current existence.
Taking a look at mainstream society, I've often mentally rebelled at the economical-societal construct established, which our educational system desperately squares us into conformity. As soon as the ability to communicate and further assess information is formulated within a child, that child is then forced to spend year after year into adulthood within walls that stress societal information. Through meditation, we're taught the strengths of residing in oneself in a silent harmonious manner. However, the educational system has us constantly plugging away information into our minds, with short breaks to enjoy each others company, where exercise is minimal and spinal columns are damaged through incessant sitting. Having a well-adjusted spine has scientifically shown to raise IQ, where our lifestyles of constantly slouching while sitting has stymied intellectual prosperity. In addition, the brightest minds did not seem to fit in our societal educational system, be it Leonardo Da Vinci or Albert Einstein, these intellectuals were educated in a different route than the majority of us who have spent most of our lives memorizing. Albert Einstein is even quoted with "Never memorize what you can look up in books", where Da Vinci only studied and learned what he wanted to learn being forbidden from a formal education due to being an illegitimate child.
Much of formal education for me was a drain, though I managed to do well. Not that I wasn't interested, and there were plenty of classes that I'm glad were forced upon me, it's just that, I look back now and ask how much of it was relevant for my life experience. In addition, I'm more interested in biology and other subjects now, then back in High School, where studying such topics then was premature. When you start weeding away the time spent on irrelevant material, significant time arises that could have been spent pursuing other more enjoyable matters. As an example, history prior to college was mostly a practice on dissecting propaganda, where due to self non-curriculum studies, I quickly understood that High School history was significantly limited and designed to mold future voters. In studying numerous success stories, I've found that if the educational system was a support system to strength children's passions, we would raise geniuses instead of conformed ants for the workforce. Not only are geniuses raised, but when following passion, especially when the seeds are allowed to sprout during an individuals youthful stages, such an individual is purpose driven.
Finding purpose, or what we're on this Earth to accomplish, is a question asked in the spiritual community, and in the self-help community. Rarely have I ever found this question raised in formal education, where educator were simply satisfied upon hearing a student was college bound. Though counselors will help in sorting through information to help a student choose a route, so very little time is permitted for such discovery. I guess summer break would be the time-frame permitted, but how many students actually choose to look for self-education during the summer, after having accomplished the stressful consistent workload of the educational system. In fact, I think I narrowed down my college major through quickly doing the I-Ching in a High School comparative religious studies course.
However, in searching for my "life purpose", the reason why I've incarnated on this earthly terrestrial body, I realized that I'm a different person when I go inside and remove societal beliefs and standards. It's the asking of, "am I doing this because society wants me to do it (education, social class, marketing, etc.), am I doing this mainly to make money, am I doing this because others have told me to do it, etc.". Finding purpose is to go back into the untainted childlike state of being and figuring out what is the most exciting for an individual. When a child dives into something, it's because he/she is curious. If the child sticks with something, it's usually because of passion. Hence, a child is often not driven by capitalist endeavors where a job or social status is most likely far-placed from the child's mind. In such purity, the child is better able to discover passion, the main key in establishing purpose. As Jesus said, "... Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven". Matthew 18:3 (KJV).
As spiritual teachers have vehemently described "follow your bliss" (Joseph Campbell), "follow your highest excitement and joy" (Law of Attraction Teachers), are meant to place an individual on the highest path to fulfillment in this life. Charles Darwin followed his childhood bliss of discovering, collecting, and cataloging biological specimen, despite what his father wanted for him. Carl Jung followed his childhood intellectual curiosity of understanding consciousness, where he questioned whether or not a rock that he sat on carried consciousness. Leonardo Da Vinci followed his childhood passion of drawing, something he utilized to spend his time as he was forbidden from formal education. In following a purpose, there is a significant passion, a bliss that arises that when one is absorbed in one's work, time is lost. Such is a stark contrast from the majority, who most likely look to when they can clock out. Something I think we all first discovered early in our school system waiting to go home.
Though most in our society, including myself lately, will often spend their time looking at the clock for the next bout of freedom. Nonetheless, it is important to note that our life experiences all have a purpose in establishing ourselves, where pertinent information is obtained, skills are developed, and we have the ability to move into purpose understanding what we're not passionate about. Hence we can move into purpose at any juncture through seeking our passions. For example, obtaining a legal degree was not blissful, but writing is, where I've been provided numerous opportunities to work on my style. Take a look back throughout your life into your early childhood and rediscover your passions and proceed with the talents and knowledge that you've since obtained. Seek to combine your passions with your skills and further proceed to unite and develop the two. As the Bhagavada Gita (2:47) elaborates, one should not look towards the fruits of one's labor. Though I've contemplated that statement to mean that one should humbly serve, especially when viewed from a strict religious sense, I now understand that statement to mean that work should not necessarily be done for the rewards sake, but should be done for the sake of purpose. In other words, the work in itself should be the blessing, not the fruits of work. The only way that is to make sense, is to passionately work.
To do things that excite you, to follow one's true bliss, is to honor the curious being within that only seeks to learn and grow in the most enjoyable way possible. We have to ask ourselves, did we come onto this planet to add to the economy, where I've often heard from others that those in monasteries are driven by self-interests as they do not provide to the gross domestic product, or did we incarnate for something so much more than our man-made societal-economic structure. Through society, we've defined success through monetary value as opposed to intellectual curiosity, though financial security is strong driving force. Nonetheless, to follow one's bliss, one's passion, one's purpose, seems to be one of the biggest rebellious acts in conformed society. It's seems to be one that leads to a purpose driven life, one that geniuses have pursued to either rebel against conformity, or reach significantly high statuses in society like the Steve Jobs types.
Overall, be as children in discovering and following your passions, and enter your own kingdom of heaven by following your purpose. For to follow purpose seems to be an unraveling of one's own passions.
I didn't plan on putting myself in this position. Since birth, I had a desire to know more, to find something that is beyond the norm as discussed by numerous Eastern Teachers. It wasn't until I read Yogananda's Autobiography of a Yogi that I discovered that the common person can have wonderful spiritual experiences, and of course Aleister Crowley had me diving in deeper. Little did I know that in studying as much esoteric as possible, that I would begin to become alienated due to my experiences.
Though loneliness seems to be a beloved companion of the sincere seeker, one who sources all from within, it would be nice to follow someone's footsteps to know if you're headed in the right direction. Whereas, I often question if I'm simply deluding myself, especially when external manifestations appear to be stagnant, though consistent signs and coincidences keep up their tease. Raising my vibration has led to fighting doubts, insecurities, issues which attempt to keep you attached to the old ways of perceiving things.
Like as an individual constantly climbs the societal educational ladder, where higher education forces people to see things from a different light, such also has the affect of alienating someone from others who fail to grasp information from a wider perspective. To break someone's deeply held beliefs, opinions, and ideologies, is paradigm shattering for all of us, though I've attempted to move towards that in order to expand myself.
Though to avoid delusion, or do things properly, I've been consistently told that I need community. However, I find communities to be extremely limiting, where religious organizations have extremely limited perceptions of other organizations and teachings. Even in Hinduism, I've found those in the Hare Krishna movement to be extremely limited in anything outside of devotion, where such individuals only follow and practice one guru's teachings. I've asked the divine within to guide me in moving through numerous intelligent individuals aka gurus to expand my consciousness. However, that's led me through Hinduism, Saivism, Advaita Vedanta, Taoism, Ancient Christianity, Sufi Islam, Egyptian, Occult, New Age, and Shamanic traditions, and probably others that I can't currently fathom. Again, it's a childhood passion.
With such a background, I've noticed conscious alienation towards others in religion or spirituality, and feel that individuals are too locked within a box. What's worse is that I can now intuitively feel what teacher or teachings are right for me, and others that would be wasting my time, by the clarity I feel inside or the ticklings of my spine. However, I feel that most are simply wasting my time. More so, I'm losing patience for those not having similar inclinations and who would rather be left in their box that I will arrogantly label as Plato's cave.
I fear the community setting, the judgment that would be posed on me as I may not completely fit a category, and would most likely challenge individuals considering themselves superior given my wide scope of experiences and book knowledge. I've gone too far off the deep end, and am nervous about joining known secretive groups, though they seem to be the only groups that understand my breadth of knowledge and experiences. In addition, I find the sychronistic pull towards a book, a teacher, or an event to be the quickest way for growth, not joining and committing to a group.
Then again, Jesus, Siddhartha Guatama, and Mohammed challenged themselves in solitude before community, where I rarely see those in large communities flourish to the level of their masters. Maybe this is just what I need for proper development. Trust in my Higher Self, trust in the purpose and intent of my Higher Self, and just realize "all this pain is an illusion". Development of Self first and foremost and let all else fall into play. After all, loneliness is only an illusory internal state of being due to unaligned though-constructs, that can be consciously shifted knowing all is sourced from within.
One of the greatest teachings I was provided in viewing societal structures and life in general, is that, if you want to find the root of a client's problem, don't necessarily listen to what the client says, but more importantly, follow the trail of money. Take that teaching and move it into every aspect of society. You'll find corruption, conflicts of interest, and a plethora of issues in almost every aspect of society. To get to the heart of the problem, follow the trail or money.
In prior presidential debates, candidates would be asked "is healthcare a right, or a privilege". Essentially, candidates were being asked, should everyone have healthcare, or only those that can afford it. Of course, the answers were divided between party lines, where either it's shared, or there was the fear of limited resources being presented indicating that only if you can afford it should you be able to receive it. In an economy where wealth perpetuates wealth, where those who have the financial resources are able to obtain the lower interest rates so they would never have to use their own money for risky ventures, as well as the continual divide between the social classes with the middle class being squeezed out since the George W. Bush administration, healthcare has become a financial issue more than ever. In every political debate discussing healthcare, the finances are what is discussed, not necessarily the quality.
Politicians are not medical doctors nor scientists. Though most are attorneys who through their profession, must learn about different non-legal areas in order to provide proper representation, such representation is done through a narrow lens where you look for individuals in the represented industry who will say what you want them to say. When politicians address healthcare, they address the costs and who should be able to obtain healthcare. None, at least within my purview, have addressed the issue of healthcare in a capitalist environment. Basically, is our medical industry looking for cures or are they looking for repeat customers?
Let's face it, we've all needed finances in order to survive in this man-made collective arrangement we call society. Take it one step-further, most of us have a little bit of Donald Trump fantasy in us, where we would like to have the finances of a business tycoon and walk around like some wall-street fat cat. Especially when inner work hasn't been done, when all can be found and sourced within, where we choose to look to external circumstances to dictate our happiness, we get caught up in this rat-race trap to find our happiness. Such is found through probably every CEO or Board Member of a medical non-profit that I've witnessed, whose driving around in a luxurious tax deducted company car, and living a lifestyle that many have only dreamed of, again with many luxuries such as fancy restaurants being written off. The taste of power and money is all too enticing, and I'm far from saying that such is bad. It's when others are manipulated and trodden upon to attain such that I pose some issues.
The biggest threat to Western Medicine is Traditional Medicine, or what is deemed "alternative" in the Western world. Basically, if you provide someone with a cure, the medical industry no longer has a client, or a dependent who needs to keep coming back for assistance. Second, if the cure is natural product, as often provided under traditional medicine, the medical industry cannot put a patent on the product. As evidenced by the pharmaceutical industry, where a majority of their profits do not go into research, but marketing, natural products are an extensive threat to a major profitable industry. Hence, in order to survive, these guys need political representation, lobbying, with the intent to stop traditional medicine from flourishing.
Growing up in the Western world, we go to the doctor for health concerns, and we place a significant amount of trust within our educated for assistance. This is something coined as the "expert phenomena" where individuals will subdue their logic and place full trust in someone who has an "education" or a "certificate". However, we now live in the age of information, where a wealth of information is just a few clicks away, where the average individual can now research their own issues and have a better discussion with their health practitioner. Nonetheless, provided the amount of traditional medicine information available, the Western Medical world has had some trouble addressing such issues, especially when the trail of money begins to flow elsewhere.
Growing up in an Eastern household, a few relatives took the alternative medicine route, studying Oriental Medicine and Indian Ayurvedic Medicine, practices predating much of even basic cultural development in the Western wold. Hence, I've seen and obtained the benefit of acupuncture/cupping and proper nutrition. In order to properly discuss these topics within the Western world, it was pivotal to understand the Medical communities views on these topics. Hence, I've done the research a few years back and the National Institute of Health had even stated that there was something more to acupuncture beyond the placebo affect, where clients had more benefit from actual practitioners as opposed to individuals that were randomly sticking needles on one's body. However, when the National Institute of Health released that information, a plethora of Medical school furiously opposed the research arguing that such should not even be studied as it's an "old wives tale". My legal mind expected a better, more scientific argument from the Medical community, one that would refute the non-placebo affect of acupuncture. So why would an educated community make such a "poison the well", and extremely arrogant, type of argument I asked myself? Well, just follow the trail of money. This type of argument reminds me of when attorneys go into Court bragging about what big law school they attended, what big firm they are employed at, or what ground breaking cases they've worked on, as opposed to actually arguing the merits of the presented moving documents.
With the recent Olympics in Brazil, the global news and social media were astonished at the many athletes, including the prominent Michael Phelps, using "cupping", a traditional Asian practice akin to a deep tissue massage. I've used cupping myself numerous times, all which throughout the days thereafter have led to release of significant muscular tension, in addition to the numerous marks. Hence, it makes sense to me for athletes to receive cupping. A quicker fitness recovery leads to better performance. Though most fitness and nutritional blogs came out in support of cupping, again, the scientific community placed the practice into the category of a placebo while admitting that much research (in the Western world) needed to be done to discuss the benefits. Again, such arguments resound with how the Western Medical community responded with acupuncture. If much more Western research is to be desired in the very ancient practice of "cupping", why are they so quick to group "cupping" into a placebo affect, as in, inferior to Western Medicine? Especially in a world where it is much healthier to receive "cupping" as opposed to taking a pill, even if it is over-the-counter pain medicines, you'd think the Medical Community would either be more receptive, or actually attempt to study the merits thereof.
In a nation that is extremely hocked-up on pharmaceuticals, you would think the Medical industry would look for better options, as opposed to fighting them. The Eastern world takes a deeper holistic approach, using many modalities frowned upon by the mainstream Western world. From using astrology to find an individuals ailments, to discovering someone's body type and providing a nutritional/fitness approach based on the assessed information, to analyzing someone's lifetyle, the Eastern world has attempted to assess someone inside out, in a preventative manner. The Western world is slowly grasping prevention, where the Western world has focused on after the fact of disease or injury, and only on the disease as opposed to the cause of the disease.
To take this one step further into the realm of odd for the Western practitioner, the Western world will never be able to fully understand the Eastern modalities without attempting to understand the source of all, Consciousness. Psychology has a long way to go in the Western world, where individuals like Carl Jung extrapolated much from Eastern Philosophy and Western Esoteric. In addition, the next generation of rebellious psychologists were censored, such as Wilhelm Reich whose later students developed bioenergetics. In fact, Wilhelm Reich is the case study of the most censored individual in U.S. history, not Nikola Tesla. Reich discovered the ability to manipulate prana, chi, etc., though he named it orgone based off of orgasmic energy. Such healing modes are directly involved with an individuals state of consciousness, of mental psychological health, where the dissonance in one's life manifests as dis-ease. Such is further found by individuals who have been involved in hypnotherapy, traditional ayhuasca ceremonies, or other esoteric psychic healing modalities, where the disease in one's life is directly related to that individuals thought processes.
Though, because of the "expert phenomena", many will continue to refuse their own reasoning when it comes to "established" Western practices, and much Eastern practices will require an understanding of Eastern philosophy to understand what is really going on inside oneself. The traditional modern Chemist (not ancient alchemist like Isaac Newton) or Biologist, will have many issues in resolving Eastern practices as they will always look for objective evidence. Nonetheless, the Eastern Philosopher, and Physicist (particularly those studying subatomic particles/quantum mechanics) who understands how consciousness affects objective reality (double-slit theory), should understand the power of Eastern Traditional Medicine. But before the Western world can even grapple with Eastern modalities, psychology, and philosophy, we still have the issue of the trail of money within the Medical industry. If it's not profitable, in fact counter-profitable, how is this industry going to handle these issues?
"In the beginning was the word, and the word was with God, and the word was God." John 1:1. Christian thought has taken a logical approach to the statement of the word being God, and of course, stressing the importance of their doctrine using this statement to emphasize the "word of God". But, the Eastern world has taken a different approach to "words", with the understanding that the first word, through its emanating vibration, created the universe, Aum.
Hinduism stresses the original language to be sanskrit, a language meant to be felt through singing. The importance not necessarily on the interpretation as the sanskrit based Vedas consist of hymns as opposed to philosophical discourse, but the vibration felt within uttering such terms that leave remnants within one's vibrational field. The vibrations are to be felt within each molecule pervading one's being to the point where one is completely absorbed in the vibration being left in a trance, like some drug induced raver experiencing every note musically displayed, or a churchgoer lost in the eloquent hymns of the choir.
Though we often look for interpretation and understanding when provided some religious or philosophical concept, such is only part of experiencing mantras. We're too logically induced in the patriarchal upbringing, where the rebels are considered the ones who are moved by the feels of feminine intuition and go against the grain while looking insane. In the East we are provided with a plethora of mantras, often towards different entities, or to bring in differing fortunes. But, even in the East, the logical mind seems to want to grasp onto definitions and reasons, where the realm of mantras is a realm that is beyond the realm of the common senses that leave us engrossed within the maya based illusion creating delusion. In other words, mantras are meant to be experienced and consciousness shifting, before they are to be logically understood.
I've practiced mantras on and off all throughout my childhood. Though at that time, I was too engrossed with the thought of the practice, what it could bring, and what the mantra means. I picked up the mantra practice again in 2014, where blended in with bouts of mindfulness, the practice evolved on it's own course where I feel like I've been internally guided on how to do the practice correctly. I still use the same japa beads that I've had since I was a child as a reminder of where I've come from, but now, instead of the number of times that I do a mantra being important, what I stress is the ability to feel into the vibrations of the terms, which often leaves me with the inability to even do one round with my japa beads. I sometimes now feel extremely stressed in the practice, like my body is attempting to hold and handle too much feels. From feeling tension within my head to my body feeling extremely exhausted, I noticed that the practice is like strength training. I'm all for it, since it's all about expanding our own abilities, and mostly, our own consciousness or ability to be aware and perceive new insights.
Provided that I use entities as guides to bring me towards expanding my consciousness, there are two entities that I have settled with, Kali and Padmasambhava. I've been intrigued with Kali since I was a child, and she feels to represent the highest feminine for me, the Adi-Shakti. Her fierceness is what I believe has helped me clear away and pierce into the heart of the matter. Overall, she's a great thought-clearer who helps me get into mindfulness. One would think that the other entity would be Kali's counterpart, Shiva. However, I define Shiva as Higher Self, the cosmic consciousness, the state of mind that I wish to obtain in my practice. Shiva's mantra appears to be calm and relaxing, and if Kali gets too intense, I turn to Shiva. However, Padmasambhava is my choice, where, as an enlightened master above the wheel of samsara, he appears to provide all sorts of shocks to my consciousness and an overall feeling of upliftment. I've done mantras to many of the entities within the Hindu pantheon and the Christian Lord's Prayer, where the two above-mentioned feels right for me, for now.
Kali is intense and would rather not disclose her mantra here. However, Her Mahavidya form of Tara, which I believe is also within the Tibetan Buddhist home where she appears more compassionate, would be a beautiful expression I would recommend. Om Tare Tu Tare Ture Soha is a beautiful calming resonance over the fiery Kali. In addition, the Guru Rinpoche mantra for Padmasambhava is also highly recommended, which can easily be found on youtube. Overall, I feel the feminine will help you deal with circumstances, clearing, and is an overall blessing to walk life with clearing the way for the masculine to adjust consciousness. Hence, I wouldn't recommend jumping around with different mantras, but dedicating a practice to a chosen few, if not one mantra.
In proceeding to do a mantra, enter the meditative trance by whatever means you see fit. This means, get into a state where you're deeply relaxed, your breathe is deeply moving in (towards lower spine) and out in a natural manner, and you may be getting slightly sleepy in an almost hypnotic state. One technique that I'll occasionally use is to focus on each body part from the top of my head downwards (or vice-versa) with the intent that each body part is relaxing. For me, telling each body part, or sending it some sort of relaxing imaginary light works to release significant tension. In fact, use some hypnotherapy techniques, like swallowing an imaginary relaxing pill and feel it dissolve immediately into your blood stream relaxing your entire body. In doing this practice, thoughts will naturally subside the deeper one relaxes. And the closest you can get to higher self is the closest you can get to subduing the monkey mind of thoughts.
When you proceed to do the mantra, the goal is to feel it. Hence, use the imaginative abilities to move the vibration from the mantra around your body. I typically use my internal mind voice to chant mantras, which then can go through numerous phases within my inner cavities.
1) I typically begin with visualizing my pineal gland as numerous loudspeakers pointing in every direction bursting out the mantra into my inner body. Just like you can feel the bass from loudspeakers, so do I feel the reverberations within myself.
2) The stronger those vibrations get within myself, the more chaotic it becomes to contain. Hence, I will then see my skin as like a stable "bell" attempting to hold the vibrations within. The stronger the vibrations get, the "bell" begins to also vibrate and pulsate outwards into the world.
3) When the intensity of the vibration becomes too intense within, I imagine that the top of my head opens allowing the vibration to shoot upwards and out of me. Do note, that I also perceive a grounding cord from my root chakra into the center of the Earth. Like an electrical shock, grounding is necessary.
4) The crown opening usually helps release a significant amount of intensity, where I then rest in the lingering vibrations of the mantra within myself, where I attempt to have each of my molecules absorb the vibrations.
5) Thereafter, I proceed to not only have each of my molecules absorb the vibration, but also become loudspeakers and pulsate the mantra outwards. This has a dual affect of emitting and absorbing the vibration.
6) If your mantra is based of an entity, imagine yourself as that entity. It's important to note that the symbolism behind that entity of your choice is important, as that is what you are attempting to embody, to bring in to help assist you.
My practice is constantly evolving, and I allow myself to listen within on how to proceed when I do my mantra meditations. My goal is to use whatever entity I choose to expand myself, to allow more Higher Self to flow within with the help of the entity. The feel of it is like blissful breathing within my body, and mostly within my head, where the darkness of closing my eyes begins to "light up" as if there was a light bulb on top of my crown. Occasionally, I'll perceive different insights, or will immediately write a blog post thereafter knowing I'm embodying something special. However, my goal is to remain in this field of energy as much as possible, which can be depressing and doubtful thereafter as I fall back into my Earthly circumstances. Again, it's like fitness, take in higher light and let that dissolve your current way of thinking into something more expansive.
Spiritual development appears to be divided into two-paths, which have opposed and conflicted with each other from what appears to be the beginning of organized religion. The two paths are often separated as the puritanical right hand path consisting of most organized religions where a deity(ies) is(are) propagated as saviors from what is often deemed to be the dirty occult (hidden) left hand path. Even in the mystical we still have that separation as evidenced by the Qabalist Tree of Life where one seeks to know, as opposed to the Qabalist Qliphoth where one seeks to become. Nonetheless, the left hand has been historically used to cleanse oneself, and is thus considered filthy, like Tantra which seeks to unite a Yogi into cosmic self realization as the main goal, as opposed to propagating a deity.
Nonetheless, the two aspects have often been at war with each other, where the left hand path is often considered "evil", where organized exoteric religion has historically sought to exterminate those of the left establishing secret societies. Though, it is my belief that the higher ups in organized religion practice left hand path, but expound right hand path in order to create submissiveness, such can be found through the numerous symbols used in Catholicism, the root of the majority forms of Christianity (not Gnosticsm, where the Cathars were eliminated to make way for Mithraic Romanism...ahem Catholicism via creed of Nicea). Numerous symbolism of the subtle body can be found within Catholicism, though the masses are still clueless, and/or call it the "illuminati".
The left hand path has always been a home for those persecuted by the higher ups, like the Tantric tradition from exoteric Brahmanic rule, Gnosticism/Knights Templars (the source of the Baphomet in correlation with the Hashashin/Order of the Assassins) and really a whole plethora forms of esoteric Christianity like the teachings of Swedenborg/William Blake from the majority forms of Christianity. Though, it took me decades to really discern the practices between the two aspects, and feel that both are necessary for proper development. However, that train of thought is eluded by those on the right hand as evidenced by the following parable often expounded by devotees.
As a common devotional parable goes, there was once a devotee and a yogi, who practiced their techniques with many years of earnestness to have a glimpse of the divine. Krishna appears to the yogi, where the yogi asks, "how many years before I am liberated"? Krishna responds with "you've done very well, you will only have three more life-times before liberation". However, the yogi wanted immediate liberation, where three more lifetimes was too much. The yogi gives up his practice in disdain and returns to common life. Krishna thereafter proceeds to the devotee where the devotee asks the same question, "how many years before I am liberated"? Krishna responds to the devotee, "though you have lovingly served me, you still have as many lifetimes as there are leaves on this tree". In excitement, the devotee thanks Krishna elated that he has many more lifetimes to worship his divine. Upon seeing that elation, Krishna immediately brings the devotee to Krishna's heaven.
Though the parable shows the strength of devotion, in my belief, such is required to open the heart chakra. Without such opening, one cannot advance into the higher realms, or even properly open the third eye, which would open the rainbow light body/merkaba. In addition, that's how you purge Karma and keep it off, by being unconditionally loving no matter the crucifying life circumstances to the point where you can energetically forgive and love everything. That might bring liberation on its own course, but another angle is the left hand path. Those on the left do not necessarily seek to just be with a divine of choice, if they have so chosen one, but they seek to be that which is divine, which still requires the opening of the heart. Even those working with lower entities, the way to subdue them is to love them, the way Lord Padmasambhava shifted the negative entities into becoming the protectors of Dharma.
As indicated above, the devotional right hand path seems to be a stepping stone the dangerous left hand path. I say dangerous as this is a path where one integrates the shadow self by facing one's inner demons (lower emotions), which can create dangerous inner vibrations that via law of attraction manifest in the external world requiring clearing. Having devotion, having guides, will make this process much less dangerous, which without such, can do a number on one's psyche. As indicated by the parable, it's the fast path route that can get you to spiritual completion, though a guide can also work wonders.
Nonetheless, it appears that the left hand path is the proper inclination for the next step of spiritual evolution, as the phases are laid out within the Advaita Vedantic text, the Tripura Rahasya (Secret of the Supreme Goddess). As stated, "One learns true devotion to God after a meritorious life continued in several births, and then worships Him for a long time with intense devotion. Dispassion for the pleasures of life arises in a devotee who gradually begins to long for knowledge of the truth and becomes absorbed in the search for it. He then finds his gracious Master and learns from him all about the transcendental state....The inner Self is realized in advanced contemplation and that state of realization is called nirvikalpa samadhi."
The right hand path is that of the dualist who seeks God outside of himself. Such consists of the majority of religions, and in Hinduism, is found under Dvaida Vedanta with the belief that the soul (atma) is separate from the ultimate reality (Brahman). When one longs for Truth beyond devotion, one seeks the left hand path of nonduality, recognizing the God within. Such consists of what esoteric traditions have sought to learn, and in Hinduism, is found under Advaita Vedanta with the belief that the soul (atma) and the ultimate reality (Brahman) are identical (like the air outside of a jar and within a jar, it's still air). Brahman, the ultimate reality is simply "Brah" or expansion, and "Mana" or mind. Hence, expansion of mind/consciousness/awareness.
Such individuals have faced persecution by those on the right hand, where it is blasphemous to be a God, to act like a God, to feel like a God, even provided that our ancient traditions told us who we really are. As Jesus said in John 10:34, "Jesus answered them, Is it not written in your law, I said, Ye are gods?". Acknowledging this power is not "evil" where all such beings should be grouped into an evil left hand "illuminati". What makes such power evil would be what is done with it.
Hence, it may be time to recognize that both hands belong to the same being. And that being is the only one in existence, the Cosmic Self.
Through active meditation, where I attempt embody and strengthen my ability to love, to love loved ones, to love strangers, to love enemies, to love the animate and inanimate, to love the infinite cosmos in all Her glory, and to fully realize the love I have of myself (which is naturally always there under all of the karmic filters I've placed on myself), do I seek to source and embody my highest vibration. This is the ability to love All That IS, and I mean all of it! To love the ups and downs, to love each transient experience. This is the state required to obtain rainbow light body of the Tibetan masters. It is also the state of firing up the Egyptian Merkaba.
Take a few deep breaths and try to relax as much as possible. Let go of your story-line that holds you within your body by relaxing each area of your body, relax each of your chakra areas, and recognize that you are the space within and around each of your atoms spreading way beyond your physical form. Just breath into yourself as much as possible, in the most relaxing way possible. Fill yourself up with air starting from your pelvic floor and reaching slowly up to, and out of, your crown. Feel it tingling all throughout your core, your neck and head, and out through your limbs. Do what you need to do to get you into that meditative mood, where breathe is more natural to the point where thoughts tend to subside.
Feel the love that deeply resides in your heart. If you've accepted a particularly divinity in your life that you feel can provide you with unconditional love, reach for that being within your heart. For me, it is the Divine Mother, the womb of the cosmos that I visually craft as the Egyptian sky Goddess, Nuit (Night). Reach for that unconditional love that slumbers deep within your heart. Connect your heart to your third-eye, the area within the center of your head with a golden cord. Feel the loving vibrations first begin to pump from your heart into your third eye area. (Should this get too intense: 1) limit the vibes going to your third-eye; or 2) connect the tip of your tongue to the roof of your mouth and imagine the sensation moving down from your head through your tongue, into your throat, and down into your lower dan tien below your navel). Take your time and keep breathing into accepting this unconditional love within, where you will further now spread the love from your heart outwards penetrating into each of your atoms. If you can't love yourself, then imagine your chosen divinity loving each of your atoms.
While this love is felt emotionally within your being, in order to increase the vibration, feel that love extending to your loved ones, to your strangers, to things in life that you find beautiful, such as nature herself and her wonderful creatures. One of the creatures that I truly enjoy on this planet are dogs, where I feel unconditional love, a love that requires no story or status or achievement. When I get to spend some time with these creatures, I can emotionally feel myself moving into a brighter happier state of being. They also have an "awww" factor that further invigorates my emotional vibrations. So find your loving "awww" vibration and blend that with your love.
As you blend that emotional construct within your being, be in a courageous no-fear zone, one that has the ability to let things that trigger you dissolve, and send out love to those things in life that you find difficult to forgive, to forget, and to overall love. Send love to those that have hurt you, that have controlled you, that have dominated you, and let the unconditional love of your divinity slumbering within the caverns of your heart dissolve all emotional triggers with those memories, ideologies, and beliefs/thoughts. This may take some time, this may take some pain, this may take some faith either in your divinity or within your own Self. You're basically using neuro-linguistic programming to color, negate, release memories that cloud up your being. You're releasing karma, you're letting things go.
Once you're ready to move on, push that love out into and onto Mother Earth, your cosmic spaceship who is also alive and brimming with known and unknown life. From the Earth, spread the love out into the galaxy to the planetary solar system. Feel the blessings of each planetary consciousness and the energy of the Sun, our symbol for the infinite light of consciousness. Send the Sun love for having the ability to brighten up your day. From here, move into as many galaxies as one can imagine and keep expanding your awareness to encompass all of the cosmos and everything you can possible imagine. Then flip the script. Imagine that, and more so know that, all of the cosmos is beautifully alive and within you. See "all of it" within your own skin, within and encompassing the depths of your inner being. For you are the microcosm of the macrocosm, the as above so below, as within so without.
Vibrate Love and Light, Be love and light.
Overly educated and continuously exploring and revealing more behind the veil.
"It cannot be too highly emphasized that the mystic swims in the same waters in which the psychotic drowns."
-James Wasserman, The Mystery Traditions