Before my meditation, I felt it was time to visit a new Mahavidya. I went through some mantras dedicated to less familiar Mahavidyas, and found that Ma Bhuvanesvari's mantra felt the most dissonant like it was triggering me the most. I settled for her mantra, quickly glimpsed over her description expressing ruler of the universe, red skin, and her association with wealth. I've been seeking mostly the fiercer forms of the Mahavidyas, where wealth and abundance pales in comparison to spiritual awakening. Nonetheless, having visited Kali, Tara, Chinnamasta, and Ma Dhummavati, I felt myself ready to experience the material world again.
With Ma Buvanesvari, I felt myself feel loved like never before in my current memory. It was a love that was conditioned solely on my existence, for that same love spreads out throughout the whole creative universe. This was an expansive love effecting more than just my emotive sensations, where my physical body similarly responded with the ability to breathe higher into my lungs, with my spine stretching/cracking around the upper chest, back, and neck area.
Just as a righteous Queen will look at her kingdom with compassion, so does the ruler of the universe. As I was in the void of meditation, I received a phone call from an elder aunt. This aunt's home has been the spiritual fortress where crooked relatives would go to get straightened up. Her home is where we would hold our spiritual gatherings, where my Uncle is considered the spiritual elder. Hence, this aunt would be a perfect representation of Ma Buvanesvari. Given the age of my aunt and uncle, I feared something terrible had happened and immediately called back after missing their phone call. However, it turns out, my aunt simply wanted to give me an unexpected late birthday and early Christmas gift. She wanted to pay for my flight to and from Standing Rock, ND.
In my phone call with my aunt, I felt accepting that money wasn't right. My family has done much and continues to do so, I should be repaying them. However, the urge to fight over the gift quickly diminished in me, as I was still gloomy from meditating. It felt like in accepting this gift, I was also giving a gift, a gift to my relatives with the ability to feel the joy of giving. I know it means a lot for them to give me something special. This feeling of graciousness is probably better than any material gain, and is probably the true wisdom to be gained from acquiring wealth and abundance.
Immediately afterwards, I returned to my meditation and realized what had just occured. The timing couldn't be more syncronistic. Here I was invoking the ruler of the universe, the divine Mother, who is associated with "material wealth", and she couldn't even wait until after my meditation to let me know how much she loves me.
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Overly educated and continuously exploring and revealing more behind the veil.
"It cannot be too highly emphasized that the mystic swims in the same waters in which the psychotic drowns."
-James Wasserman, The Mystery Traditions